Matt George Lovett (Thursday, 07 March 2019 12:12)

Hey Chris,

Loved this idea bud, real nice injection of light-hearted comedy into the situation. In particular I like how it's virtually dialogue-free, most of the storytelling is visually done. Great work.

My only suggestion would be you can push the ending a bit more. I don't think you need the note 'company' written out, the empty cot (and maybe other items designed for two, board games etc) sells that on it's own.

And as a suggestion, what if you push the ending on for twenty seconds. So rather than him sealing himself in and THEN realising he's forgotten company, the door is open but he only has a few minutes to find company - he's town between his desire and time pressure. He could go outside and yell out for someone, anyone, to come join him. Maybe he even sees someone in the distance, and he's torn between running to get them (and risk not making it back to the bunker in time)? Just a thought.

Great work man, this one could be a cracking short,

Matt